March 30th, 2023- First Quarter Cancer Moving into Leo

I awoke this morning with some final expressions of my frustrations. I truly struggle within myself on not becoming irritable when responding to questions of others. I understand to be a leader, to be a teacher it is to be patient. Others do not know what I know, which is why I am to teach. Simple enough. View the world as children who are unaware and learning for the first time. However, I am still angry inside. I still fight the urge to raise my tone of frustration and weild the sword that is my tongue. I despise the ignorance of others. I truly cannot grasp why it is so difficult for some to hear me. To understand the simplicity behind my words. I will explain a topic to its simplest form. To the core essence with a thousand metaphors. I will work to find any basis of understanding to lead the others. Yet, they willfully ignore me. Their willful ignorance ignites my rage. My rage at the unnecessary resistance. My rage to the weakness within others who ultimately would rather direct themselves to their own demise. I am enraged they won’t allow me to save them. That they would rather continue to weigh the earth to the depth of her doom instead of nurturing her to the ascension of her evolution. I despise a world who only desires to stay small, close minded and feeble. My rage stems from the knowledge that was stolen from us, from the collective, from this realm.

I can accept that others are not ready to awake. I can accept that my job is not to save everyone. I can accept that some are NPCs, or some form of bot, program, determent to test you along this path. My anger is for the ones that I cannot determine. The ones that I can feel deep within them that they want to hear me. The ones that are reactive because I shot an arrow through their heart of truth. I wish they wouldn’t fight me so hard. I wish they had the strength to let go. My anger is in the hurt that it bestows upon others when I have to say “I told you so.” I can gloat a sense of accomplishment within my knowing of my power, my gifts and my essence to this world. However, it pains me that the painful decision is the one that has been chosen. I provide them all with such choice, such option, and yet they direct their will into the most destructive one. You can’t shoot the messenger, but it feels as if it’s already done before the arrow is released.

While I accept and understand my purpose, I have found the light in letting go of all the frustrations I have stated above. I have equally found light in expressing them. For if it wasn’t for this anger and outrage, I may not have the motivation to write, speak or lead. The anger can act as a fuel for the fire. Often times others find that the anger is a negative response and only driven by hatred. I have found that not to be true. The anger of spite in the determination to fight, to survive, to strive and conquer your destiny is a beautiful gift all should embrace; all should balance. It is the most difficult skill to master, the control and alchemization of ones feelings, the balanced power of a ruler. I am thankful for my gift now that I can understand how to engage with it. Fire, when undisciplined can cause the most destruction. However, some destruction is necessary for new growth. As a forrest fire cleanses the land.